Library of Water

A potential slogan for the Icelandic Tourism Board could be Iceland: You Will Get Wet as that’s been the theme of this trip to date.   Wet, from the rather persistent rainy weather.  Wet, from the spray being cast off the countless waterfalls.  Wet, from relaxing in the geothermal pools that litter the countryside.  And wet, from the beads of sweat that team down your face as you walk over glaciers, lava fields and hike up mountains.    Although they call this the land of “Fire and Ice” and Icelanders live with the constant threat of an imminent volcanic eruption it is water that is the consistent here and to quote a famous Doctor “water always wins”.

My trips to the West, to view the stunning Snaefellsnes Peninsula, and then to the South, to the Glacier Lagoon at Jokulsarlon, were proof in point as it was how water and the landscape interacted that dominated both trips.

First up was the Snaefellsnes Peninsula which is home to Snaefellsjokull the ominous peak that is the entry point for Jules Verne’s “Journey to the Centre of the Earth” (dinosaurs, giant crystals and inland seas anyone?).     The small tour group was assembled in Reyjkavik and told to expect a 12-13 hour round trip which would allow frequent photo stops. 

 

After some brief pitstops, including the town of Botnsdalur, it was not until we reached the tiny fishing village of Hellnar where Iceland provided its moody best scenery.   From a viewing point close to the hamlet I witnessed one of the most inspiring landscapes I’ve ever seen - waterfalls careering off lava cliffs and smashing into the ocean below.    Picture postcard worthy and enhanced by the brooding dark clouds and unforgiving rain that made the scene all the more unforgettable.  

 

After a lunch stop which consisted of freshly baked bread with Icelandic butter (which is mixed with mustard) and acres of Smoked Salmon at the tiniest of café’s, Fjoruhusid, it was on to the black sanded beaches of Dritvik stopping on the way to marvel at the craggy stacks that poke from the sea like hands reaching for the sky.    The black-sanded beach of Djupalonssandur provided another water phenomenon as, once a wave crashes onto the sand, the colour of the ocean becomes a crisp icy blue – a colour that can only be understood by a photograph.

A brief walk over to the adjoining beach of Dritvik allowed ample time to explore the vast black pebbled beach strewn which is speckled with the twisted orange wreckage of the trawler Eding which smashed onto the beach in 1948.   

 

The loop continued on to the coastal towns of Rif and eventually the largest town on the peninsula Stykkisholmur before looping back to the main road and back to Reyjkavik.   One 12 hour day down but unbeknownst to me a longer day was set for the next day on my venture down the South Coast to the Glacier Lagoon at Jokularson (next update).

Icelandic Folklore…

·         The 13 Christmas Elves (children of a Troll) are located in the Hills outside of Reyjkavik and if a child is naughty (as in naughty or nice) the elves will leave a rotten potato in the child’s shoe during the dead of night (as Icelander’s keep their shoes off when indoors).

Don’t be concerned – it’s what Icelanders do…

·         Babies are left in their prams and parked outside of cafes or shops (especially boutiques) – it’s weird to see the first time but I’m assured this is customary

Day of Descent

As eruptions occur approximately every 3-4 years on average in Iceland (some say it’s more like 10 years) it seemed like a good idea to explore as much volcanic attractions as possible (and safe) whilst here.  So what better than descending 120 metres into a dormant volcano and having a little peak around in the vault below.  After getting a little bit of buyers regret once I’d booked the tour this experience had become the thing I really focused on for this trip…and it surpassed all my expectations.  

I owe the Weather God a small sacrifice as offering of thanks due to the amazing day we were greeted with on the day of descent.  All I’ve heard since I’ve arrived is that this summer has been horrifically wet (especially in the South) but what greeted me was “the best day of summer” (quote from tour guide).   On arrival at the booking station I met the small cluster of souls that were braving the trip with me and they were all as excited, expectant and terrified as I.    The ‘Inside the Volcano’ tour has only been operational for 2 summers and everything that accompanies the tour is flown in at the beginning of summer and flown out at the end (in about 2 weeks from now).   With only 4 descents a day and a maximum of 15 people per descent it became apparent this was something very few people are ever going to get the chance to do and it dawned on most of us that this was pretty special.

On arrival in the “Blue Mountains”, which is the South’s skiing field, approximately a 50 minute drive out of Reyjkavik  we were met by our guide (suitably blonde and stubbled) who announced we’d be trekking across the moss laden lava field to the tour’s Base Camp.  The walk itself is not strenuous due to height grade but it’s treacherous as you navigate the lava rocks for 50+ minutes (so glad my walking boots accompanied me).      The group mainly consisted of older Brits which I found really puzzling as they struggled to make the walk little own the descent.   Maybe this has to do with the expense of the trip which potentially precludes a lot of budget travellers but myself and a young couple from Texas were the youngest on the tour.    With over 300 kinds of moss located all over Iceland the greenscape that greets you as you trek across the lava rocks is bewildering and hypnotic.

Arriving at Base Camp , located a short ascent from Thrihnukagigur’s opening, we were greeted by our incredibly friendly base camp leader who introduced us to the camp’s adopted Arctic Fox, Flame.   The little fox was abandoned by its mother and adopted the Base Camp staff as its pseudo parents – it cheerfully mingles with the crowd seemingly happy for the company and spare bit of food.  Interestingly the fox scavenges as much as she can (mittens, scarves etc) preparing for the winter so we’re encouraged to ensure all our lose items are stored in our bags.    

 

 

Thrihnukagigur translates to mean “Three Peaked” and one of the three peaks contains a small opening from which the descent into the dormant volcano is possible.   Having been dormant for over 4000 years Thriknukagigur contains one of the only fully intact magma chambers and the 120 metre drop into the chamber is equal parts terrifying and exhilarating.   In groups of 5 (of course I was in the first group) we were harnassed, hard-hatted and asked to “walk the plank” out into the volcano opening’s centre and climb down a small ladder into a window washer’s crate.   Once on board and with a push of a red button (how hi-tech) the descent began.   The opening at the top is quite small and the crate requires a shift in speed as it descends past some of the tighter spots (wheels on the side of the crate assist on stabilising the cage as it squeezes through) but once passed the tight entrance the shaft opens into a large bowl like chamber.

The photographs of the chamber do not do it justice as the reds, blacks, oranges and greys of the chamber don’t come out that well on film.  Allowed a half hour to explore the chamber the group is asked to stay in-front of the orange rope (the drop zone for anything that may fall from above) and behind the white rope (as parts of the chamber descend even further into yet unexplored territory).   Ummmm – sure happy to stay between the ropes.   And so you’re left alone to clamber over the massive rocks contained in the chamber, touch the walls where magma has attempted to blast its way out and quietly take in the magnitude of the experience.   Staying a constant 4 degrees all year round the chamber is dank and gloomy as glacial water thumps down in huge dollops on you from on high and making the boulders slippery and tricky to scale in places.   The sense of vertigo experienced as you look up is something I’ve never experienced and I actually lost my footing and fell due to the giddiness (apparently I’m not the only one to do so).    The half hour of exploring goes quickly but I’m not sure you’d need more and once on board the crate we’re hoisted back to the surface.

Back at base camp we’re greeted with a bowl of the hearty traditional Icelandic lamb soup (almost living on it), with little Flame trying to get a sneaky piece, which is much needed knowing the hour trek back across the lava field is required.           

Icelandic Fast Facts

·         Sheep roam freely all spring and summer over Iceland meaning that the lamb is truly free range (and delicious)

·          The Icelandic moss is incredibly sensitive and once damaged can take between 30 – 50 years to repair itself

·         The “Inside the Volcano” experience also has a helipad and I was lucky enough to see a helicopter landing onto the moss-strewn lava field on the day of descent

Traveller Fact

·         Just because you think you’re farting quietly does not mean you are (to the Brittish man who kept letting it rip in front of the group) best to move away from the group before allowing the vapour out.

Heathen Graves

 

It may have taken 28 hours, 3 flights and a massive layover in Heathrow but finally arriving into the land of Fire & Ice was worth the long haul.   The major airport in Keflavik is about an hour bus ride from Reyjkavik but a quick stint on the FlyBus and I found myself downtown at minimal expense (+ bonus all buses have free Wi-Fi).   Although Room with a View purports itself to be “luxury apartments” the complex has seen more halcyon days but it is located on the major shopping street in the centre of Reyjkavik.   All it needs is a good spruce really but the bed is comfortable and the apartment contains a kitchen (no single table syndrome on a nightly occasion) and some great views of the sea, mountains and city.   

My first full day in Iceland was all about exploring Reyjkavik itself.  Being a compact city I decided to see if I could tackle most things by foot.  It’s hard to miss it so I made it my first stop, the dominating Hallgrimskirkja, which is unmissable from every angle of the city (apparently it’s visible up to 20km away).    Regardless of its dominance it’s actually a great signpost from which to get your bearings.    The buildings dramatic exterior is juxtapose by a weirdly subdued inside but does contain an intimidating 5275 pipe organ.   On entering the cathedral I was treated to the rehearsals for a concert occurring night which provided a stunning accompaniment to the ride to the top of the tower where I snapped some lovely views of the city and surrounds.

Everything I’d read on Iceland’s capital mentioned the excellent National Museum, which was my next intended stop, but on route I got distracted by densely wooded and magical Suourgata Cemetery.   That’s another city and another major cemetery under my belt – never knew it’d turn into a “thing”.   As the rain bucketed down the National Museum provided much needed shelter and a great insight into Icelandic history from Pagan occupation to present.     From the small bronze model of Thor, that greets you on arrival to the 2^nd floor, to the impressive 12^th Century VlaPjofsstaour Door the Museum provides a digestible step-through Icelandic history.  Iceland is home to over 320 Pagan burial sites, the Heathen Graves, which date back to 900AD and the remains of a woman and child from this era are two of the most interesting and unsettling displays contained in the collection.

 

Icelanders know how to brew a good coffee and there’s coffeehouses a plenty.   After a quick espresso in the compact Stofan Cafe it was off on the short walk (about 2km) to the Saga Museum and Perlan which sits atop Oskjuhlio Hill (another crazy architectural feat containing one of the world’s most lauded revolving restaurants).      Saga Museum gets lots of good write-ups but not sure what all the fuss was about – did not really bring the Sagas to life for me – but the view from atop Perlan was worth the walk.

The following day was the first (of many) tours that I’ll be doing on this trip and I decided to start with the “must do” or “most popular” Golden Circle tour which takes in the stunning Gullfoss Waterfall, the geothermal water spouts at Geysir and the birthplace of Viking democratic parliament in Pingvellir, which also happens to be a dramatic craggy rift between the North American and Euroasian tectonic plates. 

The unexpected stop on the tour was to an organic farm which grows tomatoes and cucumbers (what?  In Iceland) in greenhouses powered by Iceland’s abundant geothermal energy.   Over 60% of Iceland’s fresh food is produced in these greenhouses and tagged as such in the local supermarkets.   

 

Iceland is home to an abundance of waterfalls and it seemed fitting that my first Icelandic waterfall experience was Iceland’s most impressive, the 32 meter double cascade drop that is Gulfoss (Golden Falls).    Saved from hydro-electric damming in the 20’s the falls were donated to the nation in the 70s and has become one of Iceland’s most treasured tourist spots.

From water falling to water spouting the next stop on the Golden Circle tour is the impressive water spouts at Geysir.    Unfortunately the namesakes spout no longer shoots impressive shards of water (due to tourists in the 50’s clogging the spout with rocks) but a sister spout, Strokkur, shoots 30m plumes of water at regular 10-12 minute intervals.      

The final stop on the tour was the less spectacular but equally as impressive Pingvellir National Park which contains the site of the first Viking parliament.

Some fascinating Icelandic facts for a Friday…

·         Reyjkavik only has approx. 120K residents

·         Iceland is one of the least populated countries in Europe with 3 people to every sq km

·         The Icelandic Horse is the only breed found in the Country

·          Over 80 000 Icelandic Horses roam the countryside (and it’s legal to eat Horse)

·         If an Icelandic Horse is transported overseas it may never return (to contain purity in breed)

Semi Final 1 Predictions

Semi One is all about the Blahallad - which may result in an upset of two and send some unlikely acts into the final.

Here's my pick for qualifiers (in no particular order).

1. Denmark (she should win this Semi and go into the final as red hot fave)
2. Ireland (Boy Dance Act against all the Ladies will see him through)
3. Serbia (going last in this Semi will help this trio)
4. Russia (Best of the Blahallads)
5. Ukraine (Solid performer and the Bookies rate her chances for the whole comp)
6. Belarus (Judges will ensure this goes through)
7. Moldova (see Belarus)
8. The Netherlands (could be interesting as I do think this may be the big surprise and she may NOT qualify)
9. Estonia (only because I have a soft spot for this nation - heart not head)
10. Slovenia (big wildcard as she's all dubstep in the midst of a lot of Disney songs)

Other two rank outsiders are;

Montenegro - this may sneak in as it's so different to anything else in this Semi (potentially swap out with Slovenia).  

Belgium -  an outside shot as he's performing late in the Semi and his ballad is up against a lot of lady blahallads.  And his brows alone will be worth a vote or seven.

Set it to Cyclonic

My homage to the Wind Machine is up and live on SBS' awesome Eurovision website.

Be blown away by it!

http://www.sbs.com.au/eurovision/#blog/wind-set-it-to-cyclonic_130/

Ride a Dark Horse

Oh Malmo! We know this year is all about the ballad but unfortunately the Yohanna or Chiara moments are few and far between. There’s a few decent one’s in the mix that hit the essential hand clasp, key change, soaring chorus kind of moment but we'll be witness to a lot of “blah” this May. Are entrants now scared of winning as the expense of hosting the following years contest may worsen their countries position in the Euro Fin crisis?

In any case, due to the large quantity of blahlads this year a few of the “wouldn’t look twice” entries actually become ones to watch….


It’s worth jumping on one or two of these ponies…

Slovenia

Dubstep hits Ljubljana and lovely Slovene Hannah goes hardcore with a bit of dance floor thumper. In other years this would not really rate but due to the lack of great pop and dance entries this year if Hannah’s staging turns the strobe lights to “fit inducing” and she adds some near naked buff boy backing dancers giving their pound of flesh she’ll give herself a shot at the final.

Black Caviar Rating – 6/10

Malta

With #browvision well and truly on trend this year for any male entrant worth his chaff Gianluca Bezzina has made sure his brow comb will be with him in Malmo. His entry beat cherub like Kevin Borg in the Maltese national final to win a glittery ticket to Malmo and the Summery “Tomorrow” will enliven a fairly bleakish second Semi Final.

Black Caviar Rating – 7/10

Switzerland

1. Takasa perform 2nd to last in Semi Final 2 and this late run should allow for some earworming into voters memories

2. Takasa includes the oldest contestant (at 95) to ever participate in the competition performing on stage - bless and cue the novelty vote

3. Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah – an essential Eurovision chorus

Black Caviar rating 8/10

San Marino

Well Valentina Monetta must have been using last year as a dry run as she's decided to get serious this year. Her “Social Network Song”, which was only performed the once in Baku, delivered her states best result and featured some of the best lines of the competition in 2012 – “You wanna have cyber sex again?” No, I don’t but thanks.

This year Ms Monetta has chucked everything at the fan with her entry “Crisalide” and it’s gonna spray glitter. Essentially we've got a ballad, in Italian, with a smidge of operatic flair that transforms into a massive dance anthem in the last 30 seconds (sorry, what?) and delivers a cracking key change (drink!). Set wind machine to cyclonic and this will not only qualify but becomes a rank outside chance to win the whole thing.

Black Caviar rating 9/10

Georgia

Georgia's entry “Waterfall” is a Disney ballad on steroids. There’s strings, soaring vocals, clichés aplenty and two singers not afraid to dial up the cheese – the jury is going to LOVE this. Positioned late in the second semi will ensure this floats into qualification. Georgia are surely heir apparent to Azerbaijan and their placing in the final will be determined by which berth it lucks into.

Black Caviar rating 8/10

Frock Me!

Find out what the Top 10 costuming strategies have been since the introduction of the Semis into the program...

http://www.sbs.com.au/eurovision/#blog/frock-me_94/

Now Trending...

Find out my take on the TOP 5 things that will be TRENDING in Malmo by reading  my first post for SBS Televisions excellent Eurovision 2013 website at...

http://www.sbs.com.au/eurovision/#blog/top-5-now-trending_79/

The Lonely Birds

So, we’re almost there in regard to this year’s entries. Almost. We know all the performers that will take to the stage in Malmo even if we don’t have all the songs confirmed quite yet. And this year’s contest is shaping into a close, close race – with only 3 or 4 songs really standing out so far as ones that could take the “Glitter Ball” trophy.


So, this year’s not that stellar, in terms of the quality of entries, but come the traditional reading of the votes in the final and we may find ourselves lurching the length and breadth of Europe before we have a host country for 2014 which should make for an exciting show.

Host country Sweden, who has direct entry into the final in Malmo, created a first during their National Selection contest, Melodifestivalen, this year. Robin Stjernberg’s “You” initially had to find it's way out of the relegation final, Andra Chansen, to earn a spot in the actual final where the entry pipped the much favoured YOHIO’s “Heartbreak Hotel”, courtesy of an overwhelming majority in the judges voting, to win the chance to represent the home nation. The selection was the right one too - YOHIO's entry smacked of "novelty" whereas Robin's song is catchy, especially the “you-o-o-o-o-o-io-io-io”, and has some great dramatic moments - cue pyrotechnics.   Mr Stjernberg's challenge will be getting through the vocal gymnastics of the song on the night and the backing dancers are awful - ditch the peasant chic and replace with some glam please. Really solid entry and could see a Top 5 finish for Sweden especially as they’ll feature in the later half of the final. Is a repeat win on the cards? Don’t discount it – Robin’s already #1 on the Swedish singles charts with this entry and the song is charting in Denmark & Norway.

The Netherlands have been in the Eurovision wilderness for many, many years without a crumb trail to follow to find their way out. Victims of the “revolt against the West” it’s been a tough gig for the Dutch in recent years with no entries making it past the Semis but in sending Anouk, a superstar in her native Netherlands, they may just have discovered the dry loaf that can be used to start a trail back to "contest contenders". "Birds", Anouk’s entry, is a haunting ballad which will, again if given the correct staging, see her as a firm favourite for the title. Boding very well for Anouk is that she too is topping the charts in her native The Netherlands where the song actually entered the singles charts at #1. Good signs if The Netherlands could vote for themselves…doh! Still – list this as “one to watch”.

Returning to the contest this year is Armenia and they’ll be represented by the fabulously mono-browed Gor Sujyan with his entry “Lonely Planet”…um, yes the irony is not lost on me or any of my colleagues. At least he named his entry correctly not like the mistaken name given to our company by our founder from a misheard Joe Cocker lyric. This is not my “cup of tea” by any stretch. The vocals are strained and the song, although earnest, is clumsy. This meandering offering is turning into a bit of a bookie favourite and Armenia have a great track record in the competition so I’d expect this to qualify through to the final. If he gets a spot late in the final he could feature prominently toward the end of the night.

Drums – check! Disco lights – check! Big dance-chorus – check! Ireland are taking the competition seriously again. Phew! Young Ryan Dolan’s “Only Love Survives” is one of my favourite songs this year so far. It’ catchy dance pop and should have some excellent percussion staging (take note Ms de Forest). The Irish National selection had acts being mentored by “industry insiders” and producer Stuart O’Connor’s slick influence assists this entry. Ryan’s in Heat 1 and this entry will stand out due to its exuberance and should qualify for the final. Again, Ryan needs to watch his scratchy vocal.

And now to one of my perennial favourites…Estonia – who always put up a worthy entry for consideration. Ott Lepland was last year’s real breakout performer with his stunning rendition of “Kuula” and equally impressive trouser theatrics. The gorgeous Birgit Oigemeel will be taking another simple ballad “Et uss saaks alguse” or “So there could be a new beginning” into Semi #1 (the more competitive of the 2 Semis). Birgit’s flowing black hair would give Morticia Adams a run for her money and this simple song could find itself in the final very easily.

And I have not even touched on Azerbaijan’s answer to Saakis Rouvas or GB’s latest gamble by sending 80’s songbird Bonnie Tyler into the competition. So much more to come…

For the record – my top 3 remain – Denmark “Only Teardrops”, Norway “I Feed You My Love” and Ireland “Only Love Survives”.

I've got the "Glittery" Ticket!

Hats off Europe – many of you appear to be getting a lot of your National selections for the ‘Vis right this year. Recent National finals in Finland, Norway and Malta have thrown up some worthy entries that all deserve a crack at the Grand Final at the big event in Malmo.

“Where is my proposal?” squeaks Krista Siegfrids during the opening verse of “Marry Me”…well no dear there’s no proposal but there is a ticket to Malmo for you to perform your 80’s up-tempo ditty courtesy of the Finnish voting public. Uunden Musiikin Kilpailu (UMK – it’s just easier) was run and won this weekend and it ended up being a tight race that came down to the public vote to decide who would get the “glittery” ticket. Personal favourite Diandra made it into the final 3 along with Siegfrids and Mikael Saari but it was the blonde in the wedding dress that took the bouquet. She’s perky, the songs cute (the chatty bippy chorus is a winner) and the performance will be classic Eurovision. If she substitutes the backing dancers for buff oiled shirtless men in tuxedos and cranks the wind machine to “cyclone” she’ll sail straight into the final.

The Norwegians too seem to have sent a very worthy entry to Malmo this year and one which should be immediately classed as a “dark horse”. Margaret Berger was an overwhelming first choice from the Norwegian Melodi Grand Prix this weekend with her bare yet compelling staging of “I Feed You My Love”. Referencing Bjork’s “Army of Me” this is one of the more serious entries we’ll see in Malmo but as soon as the strings kick in with the chorus there’s really no stopping your leg from tapping along. Norway have lucked into a strong spot late in Semi 2 and with some really dazzling lighting design as part of the bare staging we won’t need to put a knife to Ms Berger’s back and she should make it to the final.

And then finally one of Eurovision’s most endearing countries to have never won top prize…Malta. Kurt Calleja surprised everyone (not me – see earlier entries) to shuffle step his way into last year’s final and this year’s entry comes from another Maltese cutie…Gianluca Bezzina. It became a 2 horse race in Malta at last weekends National final  where it boiled down to Gianluca’s “Tomorrow” and Kevin Borg’s ballad “Needing You”. Interestingly Borg’s Scandi connections could have seen “Needing You” do very well in the competition but that will need to be filed under “we’ll never know”. It came down to the final round of voting to hand Ginaluca the “glittery” ticket to Malmo and guarantee that at least one Ukulele will appear on the Malmo stage. “Tomorrow” is a simple and bouncy little song and we know the Eurovision audience loves a simple ditty – see Tom Dice amongst others – and given a love for Malta in this competition a place in the final should not be discounted.

It'll End in Tears

With the national selections well under way across Europe, where nations are trying to decide who’ll get the chance to pack up their glitter bombs and oiled up backing dancers and get the opportunity to prance around on the Malmo stage for the Eurovision Song Contest in May, the next two months will prove a boon for Europop. As countries select and discard entrants, sometimes with little rhyme or reason, it’s often the songs that get left behind that actually go on to be successful (Dilba anyone?) and launch or resurrect some careers.


Iceland’s 2 semi-finals have been run and won, with former Icelandic representative Yohanna already finding herself on the scrapheap but the lovely Birgitta having survived her Semi and now with a chance to perform at the coming weekends Final (Feb 2/3). Finland have 4 finalists already, including Finnish Idol winner Diandra, with more to come. The Danes have selected their entrant in a glittering spectacle this past weekend. The Norwegians are up to Heat 3 in an attempt to assemble their finalists in the search for the perfect tune, Margaret Berger is the pick of the finalists so far, and the bench-mark for all National Selections Sweden’s Melodifestivalen kicks off next weekend with the 1st of 4 heats (and last year’s winner Loreen performed in Heat 1 in 2012…so we’ll watch carefully). Phew…and that’s only in Scandinavia!

The Danes certainly did it right. The Dansk Melodi Grand Prix collected only 10 songs for one stunning evening of energetic performances and cutting the chaff really proved for a successful show. Sultry Emmelie de Forest’s ‘Only Teardrops’ secured the Danish berth for Malmo. This song certainly will sit well with the Eurovision voters with an eccentric performance, a slightly ethnic mix of whistles/ recorders and some serious drumming action that cuts in at regular intervals but best of all is the mid-tempo "Oh My God' i'm singing it in my car chorus.   We're certain to see some pyrotechnics in the final staging and, given the Danes good track record in the competition, Emmelie has stamped herself as an early frontrunner.

But, it’s Kate Hall’s ‘I’m Not Alone’ which is a great example of a super pop ditty that’s got the potential to perform well on the charts but won’t grace the Eurovision stage. Hall’s performance borrowed a little form Loreen’s winning entry last year but with a big bonus of adding laser lights. Seriously, this girl had a costume reveal, serious smoke machine action and laser light show…think of the drinking games DENMARK!

With Malta, Iceland, Finland, Sweden and Norway all undertaking their national finals in the coming weeks it’s a good time to certainly trawl through the various heats, semis and finals to discover the gems that may not actually hit the stage in Malmo this May.

We're Going U U U U Uuup!

Top 5 Final Predictions

We'll be going to Stockholm, Belgrade or Rome in 2013...but it's anyone's race and it really comes down to where acts will perform in the final!   Could the favourite actually take the top prize?   I'd like to hope so...it's about time the contest returned to Sweden.

1. Sweden

2. Italy

3. Serbia

4. Russia

5. Denmark or Iceland

Inside the top 10 - France, Germany, Norway and Ireland with a rank outside chance to Romania and Cyprus


Semi Final 2 Predictions

Could this be the year that Georgia, Turkey and Israel all miss the final???

Donny's lost his way...



1. Serbia

2. Sweden

3. Ukraine (when Boobs attack)

4. Bosnia n Herzegovina

5. Norway

6. Slovakia (for the hair and the pecs)

7. Estonia

8. Lithuania (for the literal interpretation)

9. Malta (not realistic but I have my fingers crossed)

10. Slovenia

Excuse me...I've lost my hunky backing dancer(s)

Here are my picks for Semi 1

Anggun (France) - we'll have to wait till the final to see where they're taking her...

1. Iceland (best song in this Semi)

2. Greece

3. Albania

4. Romania

5. Cyprus

6. Denmark (potential Top 5)

7. Russia (likely runner up)

8. Ireland

9. Moldova

10. (hard pressed but I think it’ll go to) Israel or (if the audience loses their minds) Austria

Bad luck to Montenegro (really – 3 times going first in the first Semi is awfully bad luck but you sent an awful song so insert something about karma here).

Shame on San Marino for sending one of the worst songs to have been entered into the contest in the last 5 years…not a good way to return to the competition. Really a song about Facebook and Social Networking…urgh!

Missed opportunity for Latvia – former winners should know better than to send this kind of trite.

Snow Storms, Marching Bands and Y-Fronts

Now that I’ve delivered all the content for SBS Televisions forthcoming Eurovision ‘12 website (phew – I’ll let you know when it goes live!) it’s back to this year’s contenders…and it’s onto the girls.


As there’s over 21 female solo performers in this year’s competition I’ve extended this list to feature Top 10 ladies (as there’s some excellent entries which may fail to qualify due to the abundance of ladies on stage).

(Still from Anngun's Video for Echo (You and I)

10. Portugal – Filipa Sousa – “Vida Minha”

I’ve always had a soft spot for the Portuguese entries and this year’s Fado inspired entry is worth highlighting. Expect lots of hand grasps and the use of one powerful wind machine at one stage. IF there’s a costume reveal she’ll have achieved the trifecta. As Portugal’s qualification beyond the Semi-Final has been patchy in recent years Filipa Sousa will struggle to qualify but this is a great example of where Eurovision can highlight a unique musical styling of a particular slice of Europe.

9. Greece – Elftheria Elftheriou - “Aphrodisiac”

With Greece’s phenomenal track record in recent years I would expect this entry to qualify for the final – although it’s not the best track Greece have sent to the competition. It’s a decent enough pop song with the right amount of bouncing and hair flicks from the performer but sadly the song does not really go anywhere. She’ll be saved by stripping down her backing dancers to bare a bit of male flesh whilst she cavorts around the stage.

8. Ukraine – Gaitana - “Be My Guest”

Another formidable participant the Ukraine’s recent Eurovision history would suggest that this entry will sail through to the final. It’s an anthemic pop/ dance track performed by the very booby Gaitana. On the upside she’ll have the audience dancing around on the downside she’ll need to watch her vocals as her performance at the national selection was not the best and in a year which includes some incredible singers this could be the difference between a Top 10 or Top 20 finish.

7. Bosnia & Herzegovina – Maya Sar – “Korake Ti Znam”

There was a bit of early money on Maya Sar’s entry which is a soft jazzy piano driven number. Using last year’s 6th placed Dino Merlin’s band will also go a long way to helping her qualify for the final but she’ll be pushed to replicate Merlin’s result from last year. One of the big positives for Maya Sar is that she goes on stage 2nd to last in the second Semi and is the only female solo artist in the last 6 acts (the others are all male soloists). Staging will go a long way to securing a finals birth too – expect a stark, stripped back performance with few bells and whistles.

6. France – Anggun – “Echo (You and I)”

South East Asian superstar and French national Anggun is a terrific choice to represent France. Her ethno-Asia-pop is perfect for a competition such as Eurovision and let’s hope she adopts the same staging as she has in her videoclip. Military lads, wearing only their Y-Fronts, moving down conveyer belts is surely worth Douze Points from several countries. The whistling in the chorus is cute and catchy and this is yet another strong entry from France, in recent years, have taken their participation in this competition seriously.

5. Cyrpus – Ivi Adamou – “La La Love”

A perky little pop entry which is very on trend at the moment and the best thing that Cyprus have entered in the competition in years. Fresh faced 18 year old Ivi Adamou is no stranger to singing contests having been a contestant on Greece’s X Factor 2 (so expect 12 points from Greece to go Cyprus’ way) so she won’t be concerned about performing. She’s also fortunately performing directly after the worst song in the competition (entry from San Marino) in Semi Final 1 which will make her performance look award-winning.

4. Albania – Rona Nishliu – “Suus”

My favourite ballad in this year’s contest the Rona Nishliu’s vocals are going to blow the roof off the Crystal Hall in Baku. This is a powerful ballad drenched with pathos and a forlorn acceptance of love lost. The dreadlock beehived Rona Nishliu will make a very striking figure on stage and she’ll have the audience on their feet come the end of this entry. She’s in the weaker Semi (Semi Final 1) and given a good place in the Final she may see herself creeping up the leaderboard during the final.

3. Denmark – Soluna Samay – “Should’ve Known Better”

Now we get to potential Top 5 finishers. Soluna Samay’s little Indie Pop track is currently well regarded by bookies and experts alike. Dressed in Marching Band regalia Samay strums her guitar lamenting that she “Should’ve Known Better” in a cute English/Danish twang. Channelling a little bit of Jewel and a little bit of Natalie Imbruglia this entry should get a lot of “middle of the road” votes. Pretty song, pretty girl and should place pretty high in the final.

2. Italy – Nina Zilli – “L’Amore E’Femmina (Out of Love)”

Another serious contender for this year’s top prize – my guess is she’ll take the Silver medal. Zilli has emerged in recent weeks, with Serbia, as the two entries that could actually beat Sweden’s Loreen. Taking the best parts of Amy Winehouse and Lana Del Ray Zilli’s funky ditty will be well received on the night. The only disadvantage she’ll have is that she’ll only be performing once (in the final) and may find the momentum behind the Swedish, Serbian or Russian entries to much to overcome.

1. Sweden – Loreen – “Euphoria”

It’s going to be hard topple Loreen from taking the crown in Baku. Her brilliant dance infused entry is the highlight of this year’s competition. She’s kooky – her pseudo Karate dancing will have the audience mesmerised – and her vocals are fabulous. Only Denmark’s chorus gets close to beating the anthemic “up, up, up, up, up, uuuuup….Euphoria!” of this entry. Already charting well across Europe (and even available on iTunes as a single here in Oz) she’s got a massive career ahead of her and this will propel her onto the world stage. Stockholm in 2013 then.

Beware Babushki Bearing Gifts

In a year dominated by soloists the groups and duos will stand to benefit from a voting public and jury bored by ballad after ballad after ballad. There’s a decent enough crop of contenders within this category this year, and after the high placing’s for both Denmark and Georgia at last year’s competition, expect to see the a couple of these entries feature well up the leader-board at the end of this year’s country call in.

Unfortunately I’ve had to leave out the Belarusian boy band and the lisping brothers from Switzerland in my Top 5 groups or duos off to contest for the crown in Baku but here’s the best of the bunch…

5. Austria – Trackshittaz – “Woki Mit Deim Popo”

With lyrics like “Your Booty has Feelings” and “Your Booty has an Opinion” and even “Your Booty Says Something About You” the entry from Austria’s “tractor gangsta party rap” (no, I don’t know what that is either) duo will have the Azerbaijani’s looking at their rears in a whole new light. Ahhh – how many jokes about trumpeting butts will the commentators come up with on the night. This may just qualify as it’s ridiculous. Song itself is actually a bit crap (no pun intended).

Find out what you're Booty may be saying to you here...

4. Ireland – Jedward – Waterline

After coming in 8th at last year’s competition, with the high octane “Lipstick”, those Irish Ritalin requiring twin gnomes Jedward are back for another crack (sorry, this is not Austria) at the title. However, even with a songwriter who’s written for boy bands like The Wanted, the song’s just not as good as last year. That said, expect high hair, high jumps and dodgy vocals on the night. They’ll qualify, due to their huge popularity across Europe, but they had a better shot at winning with last year’s entry. The staging will need to be flash to give them any chance of beating their placing last year but there’s a lot more in this year’s competition for the voting public to get excited about. They’ll finish in the bottom (Austria again!) half of the final.

Caution: Irish ADHD twins ahead...

3. Romania – Mandinga – Zaleilah

Now it gets interesting…this is a 7 piece Romanian Cuban inspired entry and will stand out due to its unique blend of sounds. Sung in Romanian and in English this is a toe-tapper and will have the Crystal Hall in Baku swinging. Romania deserves a win and this could be one of those lurking dark horses that snare enough votes to rattle the standout entries from Sweden, Denmark and Russia. This is one of the few entries which won both the jury and public vote at its national final so it should qualify easily and may surprise by placing inside the Top 10 in the final.

2. Iceland – Greta Salome & Jonsi – Never Forget

Now here’s a dark dirge from the depths of Iceland that no-one’s going to forget on the night. Originally qualifying from Iceland’s national final in its native tongue composer, songwriter and performer Greta Salome has opted to take an English version to the competition. And it’s all the better for it. Greta and Jonsi are the competitions most attractive couple and look like they’ve stepped off of an H&M billboard. Expect lots of drama in the staging – wind machines, some floating materials and strings on-stage will be the bare minimum. Jonsi’s been here before, having already represented Iceland in the 2004 final, so when Greta cracks out the violin half way through this ditty he’ll be cracking some decent Abercrombie & Fitch style poses to accompany her fiddling. There’s nothing like this number in the competition and it will be remembered for, at least, it’s uniqueness. Iceland, criminally, have never taken home top prize and this year they’ll give the leaderboard another solid nudge and this could even go Top 5 dependent on where they perform in the final. I’m going to invest in some knitwear just in case we’ll be in Reykjavik next year.

Delve into the darkest depths of Iceland...

1. Russia - Buranovskiye Babushki – Party for Everybody

Beware a Babushki bearing gifts. Seriously, don’t take anything from them. This is a serious contender for the top prize this year. It’ll take a lot to beat Sweden’s Loreen but this group of 6 Russian grannies could just see us returning to Moscow in 2013. Having formed in 2008 the Buranovskiye Babushki, who’s eldest member is 77, have performed all over Europe covering songs from Queen and the Beatles and shared the stage with the likes of Jose Carreras. The song’s catchy, they’re as cute as kittens and they I’ve already shocked many when they took out former Eurovision winner Dima Bilan at their national final to win the chance to represent Russia in Baku. Block country voting aside, this entry will take home either Silver or Gold and it will probably come down to where Sweden and Russia perform in the final. If either country is drawn in the top quarter (with the UK’s Mr Humperdinck) that’ll be enough to relegate them to second – that’s how close it is this year.

Check Out the Go-Go Grannies...