The 8:15 to Zagreb

After an early start I bid farwell to Ljubljana and the lovely Slovenian people and boarded the 8:15 to Zagreb.

Hint #1: Ask if the cabin you're about to climb in is First Class (particularly if you have a 2nd class ticket). Doh!

Although the rain had abated the mist had transformed into a thick fog making the train journey somewhat ho-hum as the view was somewhat masked...damn you Mother Nature!

By 11am I'd arrived in Zagreb, Croatia - after a very strange border crossing where the Slovenian police decided that I looked dodgy and needed to have my passport check for outstanding interpol. 007 eat your heart out.

After a quick check in and early access to the room - thank you Hotel Acrotel Allegra - I hightailed it to the bus depot to purchase my fare to Dubrovnik. Ticket purchased and about to leave I encounter yet another GYPSY...bloody Nora! Another one? Apparently this one wanted money for an operation on her...colon? (was not sure where she was pointing). This gypsy was a sneaky one as she'd prepared a laminated print out in several languages to explain her plight. Mmmm - she obviously wasted some of that Doctor's fee on printing and laminating. So NO gypsy you will not have my Kuna.

Hint # 2: Dumb Australians confuse the Gypsies.

So I adopted my thickest Australian accent and say very loudly "Sorry love, I don't know what you want and I don't speak your language". She grips my hand rabbiting on about "operatzion" and I repeat "Sorry sweetie - not sure what you want - good luck...seeya". And off I stride out of the bus terminal - gypsy 2 vaniquished. She's probably dead poor luv - the laminating really did not help.

I quickly made my way into the city itself, as the weather was holding, and the reason for stopping in Zagreb (not only as a through-point to Dubrovnik) was to visit Mirogoj Cemetery (arguably the most beautiful Cemetery in all of Europe). After jumping on Bus 106 I arrived at the Wall that heralded the cemetery and had another jaw drop moment. This place is impossibly beautiful. It's a little bit broken, a little bit sad and slightly overgrown but stunning in it's simplicity. And it's weird - even though this is suppose to be a place of the dead I've never seen so much life - so many people tending the graves of their loved ones, people remembering, celebrating and including the dead in their lives. Truly an inspirational place. I hope some of my pictures do it justice.

Hint # 3: Bus 106 leaves from outside the main Cathedral next to the big Fruit market - not hard to miss.

Zagreb is an intersting city - a little bit grubby around the edges, especially when compared to the manicured Ljubljana, it's very unpretentious. Zagreb is take me or leave me "I don't care" whatever you want. It has areas of stunning beauty next to rubbled ruins and piles of trash. It's a city not hung up on aesthetics but one which definitely has a pulse.

As a treat I went into a local Zagreb barber who gave me very traditional head shave - clippers, shaving cream, big scary razor and some industrial strength after shave slapped all over. At times it was a little too close to Sweeney Todd for my liking. But what a hoot! I think they were laughing at me as much as I was at them...well that's Zagreb!

Eurovision Rating: Hardcore Rock Chick screaming an angsty, guitar heavy tune in thick Croatian. Wild costume, hair and some pyrotechnics see her qualify from the semi's (just). Finishes outside the Top 15.

Next Stop: Dubrovnik (after a 11 hour bus ride - eek!)

Do Slovenian Ducks Speak Slovene?

When I arose this morning I knew that today was going to be tough. The skies were bleak and the rain was tumbling in torrents from the thick black clouds. Doh! This was my allocated day for the picturesque Bled. Oh Well!

So off I went to the Bus Station and purchased my ticket to Bled (about an 1.15 from Ljubljana and 6.30 Euro).

Quick Tip 1: Bus Station is next to the Train Station and very easy to use.

As the bus meandered through the Slovenian countryside I was struck by the beauty of the day. The mist clung to the trees as if it had been snagged by bare spidery branches. OK - today was going to be good.

On my arrival in Bled the rain appeared to have gotten worse. Thank heavens for that Umbrealla. Once off the bus I hightailed it downhill toward the lake and when the castle came into view I actually gasped outloud. I was the only one on the street, in the torrential rain, staring open-mouthed at Lake Bled and its Castle.

The Castle sits atop a 300 metre high cliff that lourdes over the Lake like a Master. It's very grand, very cool and everything you'd expect a Medieval Castle to be. It's then that you see the tear-shaped island in the middle of the lake (apparently Slovenia's only Island) with it's solitary Church and have another "clutch the pearls" moment.

Quick Tip 2: Always pack a collapsable umbrella

After a quick pitstop at the Info centre I boarded the Gondola to the island (the only person on that passage...a little bit "Don't Pay the Ferryman"). The lake itself is exquisite, the boat glided effortlessly across the water and appeared as if it was sliding on glass. No current disturbed the mineral green water which was made even more errily beautiful as raindrops erupted the waters surface accompanied by the softest of patters.

Once on the island itself I climbed the ancient steps to the Church of St Mary determine to ring the Wishing Bell (good title for a book). And did I give that Bell a yank! It's not every day you get to ring the Church Bells (on an Island in Slovenia no less). Legend has it that the original Bell was made the widow Polyxena von Kreigh in memory of her murdered Husband. Unfortunately the Bell was lost to the waters of Lake Bled as on it's journey to the island a tempest arose sinking the boat containing the Bell. Lovely Polyxena (I'm reading it as Pollyanna) so distraught by this misfortune took herself to a Nunnery where she remained until her death. On hearing of this the Church made a new bell and it was brought to the island in 1534. Apparently all that ring the Bell will have their wishes granted as way of thanks to Polyxena. So, that means I'm hosting the Australian telecast of Eurovision 2010 in Oslo with Julia Zemero for SBS. Bad luck Sam Pang (you contributed NO Eurovision history to this years telecast).

On my return from the Island the rain had gotten worse (and I'm not sure that was possible) but on the advice of the waitress from a local cafe I walked up the road to Bled Castle. And it was worth it - but only for the views. The Castle itself has been over-processed (gift stores, vid rooms, cafes etc etc) and loses a lot of the mystique that it projects when you see it from the ground. Pity the day was so misty as the photo's did not do it justice.

Quick Tip 3: When it rains in Slovenia where water proof shoes.

Sodden and a bit grumpy (and quite a few Euro lighter) I hightailed it back to the Bus Station and the eventual safety (read: dry) of Ljubljana.

On the bus ride back to Ljubljana I got a little lost in my thoughts. As I'm reading Patrick Ness' awesome Young Adult Fiction debut The Knife of Never Letting Go, whose main character can hear the thoughts (Noise) of others including animals (his dog Manchee), I got to ponder - do Slovenian Ducks Speak in Slovene? And if they do and I could hear them would it be in Slovene or would I translate them internally (similar to the Companions in Dr Who who are granted the gift of language by the TARDIS). Or is this the just the hardcore cold I have sending me into dementia.

Eurovision Rating: All boy band in matching outfits singing a Euro-trash Dance song. Catchy but in-offensive tune. Qualifies for Final but does not make Top 15.

Tomorrow: Zagreb, Croatia.

Speaking Gibberish to a Gypsy

After another breathtaking train ride - this time from Munich to Ljubljana via Salzburg - where I was granted a gorgeous cloudless day allowing the Austrian Alps to twinkle in snow peaked glory. Furry cows, furry chickens, furry goats...it appears everyone and everything in Austria adopts a furry coat. The train ride was impressive - on time, not crowded and with very, very clean cabins. Go the DB.

On arrival into Ljubljana night had already fallen and, on advice from an individual at the train station, I decided to walk to my hotel. BAD MOVE. Half way through the 6km walk I had flashbacks to a time when I'd forced Mum and Dad to walk from the Banff train station to our hotel. Oh Well - it appears I'll never learn. Ankle was not happy post the walk - so it's now strapped tightly.

Undetered by the location of the hotel (although it is very comfortable) the next morning I trudged back into the heart of Ljubljana's Altstadt. And there's only one way to describe it. Stunning. Ljubljana has one of the most attractive and interesting Old Towns I've seen. Guarded by the massive Ljubljana Castle atop a small hill Ljubljana old town skirts around the base of the hill like children under their mother's skirt. The Old Town itself is heaving with interesting shops and cafes and contains a colourful fruit and flower market in one of the Trg's. It is here that you will find the fabuolous milk vending machine with fresh Moo Juice all day. Little knooks, hidden behind massive oak doors or gaurded by impressive wrought iron gates, contain interesting shops so it's worth taking time to amble Ljubljana's cobblestoned streets to ensure you don't miss things like the Honey Shop (dedicated to all things honey) or Gourmet Chocolate shop.

Tip #1: Buy a Ljubljana Card.

It's 12.50 Euro and gets you into all of the Mueseums and Art Galleries for free and allows you free bus fares around the city. Well worth it.

Jumping on the funicular to Ljubljana Castle is a must as the cities panorama is best viewed in ascent. I think my jaw may have dropped at one point. The Castle itself is a very orchestrated affair - renovated to within an inch of its life. Accessing the Viewing Tower also gets you a short 20 minute 3D movie history of Slovenia and Ljubljana, equip with English Headset and Professor Finkle glasses, before then allowing you to ascend the spiral staircase to the tower. The views here are breathtaking - just hope for a clear day.

On my way out of Ljubljana Castle and back to the funicular I had my first encounter with a Gypsy (said with a Borat accent).

Tip #2: Speak Gibberish to a Gypsy to Fool them

The evil gypsy, in the guise of a young woman with odd Hello Kitty clips in her hair, appeared from the wood calling for help. At first I ignored the calls of the evil one and continued to walk toward the safety of the Funicular. However, her calling was too strong and I turned briefly in her direction and she knew she had. Scuttling her over-clothed body along the gravel path she advanced in my direction. I stood silently looking at the evil before me and steeled myself for battle. She opened her mouth to speak and in broken English she began "Excuse me...I'm sorry...I have problem". Knowing of the tricks of the gypsy where their stories of woe extract Euro from your wallet I allowed her to prattle on about a "sickness" and a "train ride to Munich" and "how she is stuck in Ljubljana". It is then that it dawns upon me - I have not yet spoken to her and she thinks I'm an English speaker. It is then that I commence speaking to her in the lost language of Zeiherese, a very rare language that only myself and my sister Jennifer had spoken when we were children, and almost forgotten. Immediately the gypsy showed confusion and a weakness was revealed. I continued with my garbled gibberish language however being a strong gypsy she was undetered and attempted German with me. I continued with my ploy not allowing her words to penetrate my ears. Her third attempt to extract money from me commenced with hand gestures and it was with this I knew she was defeated. Using the universal hand gesture of "I don't know" I turned my back on her and strode toward the Funicular. The gypsy was defeated and vanquished back into the forest from which she had come. Although this trick has worked once with a gypsy I will not resolve to continue to use this as my only defence.

Tip #3: Tivoli Garden & Park is not a Park it's a WOOD and you need to be wearing hiking shoes if you're going to walk it (and allow yourself at least 2 hours to do the loop).

Eurovision Rating: Early judges favourite with a solid Euro-Pop outing with a catchy chorus from a single female. Not one but 2 key changes, costume reveal and scantily clad male backing dancers. Qualifies for Final. Top 5 finish.

Next Haltestellar: Bled, Slovenia.